Tonight I saw
a poem-like thingy
Tonight I saw
an adult black-crowned night heron
on 2nd ave. between 12th and 13th street
a stone's throw from the hospital for joint diseases
which sounds like a good disease to have
since you don't have to suffer it alone.
But seriously folks,
I didn't know it was
an adult black-crowned night heron.
But I called my mom
who got out her bird nerd books
didn't know what the fuck it was either
other people on 2nd avenue
started noticing this enormous bird
because a even more enormous bird
was on the cell phone staring and yapping about it
to her mom.
I descibed how enormous it was.
I said the bill and head were black --
no, maybe slate?
And the breast is white.
And not the whole head, but like it was wearing a yarlmuke
I described the bird as a
But it's not an egret.
"It's sitting on a park bench! It doesn't have a band!"
But wait, the bird had a bizarre trait.
It has a thin white ponytail.
Hearing this description, a dude watching and listening to my cell phone call said,
"Tell her it looks like a piece of speaker wire
and tell her its the biggest boid I eva seen in Manhattan!"
But mom didn't know what.
Not even with her Peterson guide.
Not even with the bird two feet away from me.
Not even with my perfectly confounding description.
Suddenly the bird craned its neck up
(was it a crane?)
revealing an even more enormous bird.
Long story short.
Mom gave me a # --
A hotline for bird nerds to call.
A prerecorded message about all sorts of exotic bird sghtings.
Followed by another # to call.
A bird nerd picked up immediately.
After a short description
that included this bird's "speaker wire" ponytail
"An adult black-crowned night heron."
and I knew he knew.
Even before I googled
black crowned night heron