Tuesday, January 17, 2006

How to Blackmail your Brother PART II

Some have informed me that blackmail is wrong.

I agree. There's got to be a better way to make a buck. For, after weeks of threats to post a compromising pic of my brother, I haven't seen a dime. It could be because he doesn't currently have the funds. I mean, I wasn't asking for a large private island, just a nice subtle one. And a jet to get to it, of course. But I got squat. So really, I should just drop it. Forget this crazy scheme. Toss that photo of him wearing a Star Trek outfit in a non-Halloween setting in the dumper.

Yeah but then how would the whole blackmail community feel? They'd feel betrayed. Let down. My idle threat would weaken the whole blackmail platform. Then, when the next blackmailer on the scene taped together her note with cut out newspaper, she'd feel a touch less secure in her endeavor.

And so, I present...
Felber Trek
On the right, Adam dresses up for a formal family event as Captain Kirk. It may have been Yom Kippur. Seriously. Click on the photo for a larger version.

But wait. All is not lost. I have an idea... Buy my brother's upcoming novel by clicking on this link here.

My brother's upcoming novel

If y'all buy the book from that link he will earn him quite a few pennies through Amazon's associates thingy. THEN, when someone invents a time machine (or Superman flies around the earth to reverse its rotation), I will go back in time and blackmail him again but this time with the info that I know he has the money in the future. Moo ha ha ha! MOO HA HA HA!

Thank you for your help in my blatant attempt for publicity/sales for Adam... er, I mean, thanks for helping in this totally evil business.

PS On the left, yes, I am hanging out with Adam wearing my skating outfit AND my ice skates in a carpeted suburban living room. Some have pointed out that this might be more embarrassing then wearing a Kirk outfit on a major holiday that isn't Halloween. So, I am thinking of blackmailing myself. Details TK.

UPDATE: Holy Crows! According to Lulu titlescorer which I found via Gawker (which they found via the NYT):
The title Schrodinger's Ball has a 72.5% chance of being a bestselling title!*

Which means my future time-travelling blackmail attempts will have a 35% greater chance of being successful!** YE HAW!

*That is, if I got the whole Mad Libsy proper noun, abstract adjective thing right.

**According to timetravellingblackmailerscorer.com